Ethereal Lights

I used to help run this RP forum known as Ethereal Lights. I started it with two friends whom I had met on a different forum. For the time that I was on that site, it was my baby, I gave everything I could to it. When we first started the site, there was a lot of drama. I tried to be online as much as possible to deal with it. I would go on the forum during class even, during my senior year of high school. I think EL is one of the main reasons I got a 2 on my US history AP exam, a subject I had always been decent at. I had spent every class on the computer, not listening.
I sacrificed a lot for that website. I scrounged for members, spent late nights posting and responding to RPs. I nagged people for votes and nominations, I came up with ideas to keep the site alive. I helped a cross to a completely different host, then the cross back when that failed. I developed relations with the people I met on the website. I developed a near relationship once, possibly twice. I was even threatened by a member. I loved that website so much that even fear for my life wouldn't keep me away.
I cried over so many things that could have been avoided if it wasn't for EL. I gave everything to that place. And it was worth it. People seemed to like the little web haven I had helped create with the other admins and moderators. But when I started college and started taking time for school, a slow take over happened underneath me. A few falling outs between staff members, and me not being around. Well it all led to me eventually being kicked off the staff without warning. I was pissed. With everything I put into the site, you'd think they would at least keep me on staff.
And as I slipped away from the site, so did the reputation I had built for myself and now it is all but nothing. The site is run by others now, people who know not of the struggles I put into that website. The sacrifices I made for it. The tears I shed. Some of those people I do not like at all. People who do not deserved what they inherited. And it frustrates me to no end. All my hard work is being used by someone else. I want to rip out my hair thinking about it.
Some of the people who worked with me are still there. One of the original three admins still hangs around, but she too seems to be losing the light we once had there. She won't even respond to a message I sent her online. This was once someone I considered one of my best friends. And she is gone from my life, so it seems. I hate how things change so much sometimes.
- Jenna
*This has been an unedited rant